I’m hearing rumors that the adjudicators are looking for the “Traditional Irish Look”, and that orange legs from fake tans are “out”. What is the “Traditional Irish Look” and does it come in a spray can?
Distraught Feis Mom,
Dear Distraught Feis Mom,
Young Ladies with the” Irish Look” are indeed, “where it’s at”, I’m told. They’re even having contests for the “Reddest Hair”, “Greenest Eyes” and “Most Freckles” at Irish Festivals throughout North America.
But all is not lost! You can always buy a flaming red wig and green contacts for your daughter, and now, with the invention of “ZandB’s Instant Freckles Butter”, finally capture the much-desired “Freckled Franny” look.
Yes with ZandB’s Instant Freckles Butter, you just “spritz it on” (by applying some to a tooth brush like the one on dad’s sink and flicking the bristles with your thumb). Allow it to set for a few minutes and spray off the excess, for that Fresh Freckled Face Girl Look! (See before and after pictures below)
We ran exhaustive safety tests on the product prior to releasing it on an unsuspecting public. OK, I’m gonna level with you; we shaved our cat, “Trebles”, spritzed him with it. He actually looks pretty impressive and there were no side effects with the minor exception of when we let him out at night all the neighborhood cats are waiting patiently on the back porch to whoop his cat butt, but I’m sure it’s just a communication issue.
As with all new products, your dancer should practice spritzing the butter before applying it on herself. Family pets and young siblings are great in this regard. You can spritz just the arms and face (watch out for those eyes) or go the “full Monty” for that authentic Gaelic Look!
Remember ladies, your daughters need all the help they can get climbing that podium. Don’t let them down!
Available soon from your favorite Feis vendors.
ZandB
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